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A Bisl Torah

A Life of Present & Future


When someone learns about my profession as a rabbi, I am often asked: As a woman, how is your experience in comparison with your male colleagues? I graduated from rabbinical school in 2009. By then, already more than 30 years had transpired since the ordination of the first female rabbi in the Reform movement, almost 25 years in the Conservative movement. My answer about my experience as a female rabbi must not be answered with, “It was mostly smooth sailing.” My answer must include both the positive sentiments of my six years at the Jewish Theological Seminary and willfully acknowledge…

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Living with Pain


Can we really get over the pain? When we feel betrayed, hurt, disappointed by someone else’s actions, how often are we able to forgive? And in which ways does the hurt dissipate? Joseph learns that Jacob has died, and his brothers fear that Joseph’s resentment is bound to return. That reconciliation only occurs out of respect of their father; not because of Joseph’s forgiveness over his brothers’ attempted murder. The Midrash explains that their fear returns when after the burial of Jacob, the brothers watch Joseph return to the pit in which his brothers had thrown him. And when he…

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Drama


I love drama. Who doesn’t love a story of lies, deception, romance and ambition? And no, I am not writing about “The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel.” I will save that for another time. The narrative of Joseph is both surprising and familiar. Confusing and predictable. Wondrous and disappointing. Joseph’s brothers were set on his demise, throwing him into a pit, uncertain of whether he would live or die. As the story turns, he is saved, rises in power through Egyptian royalty, and faces his brothers, now groveling before this emotionally wounded man. The brothers return to Jacob, their father and reveal…

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True Colors


Our incredibly soulful Sinai Temple Director of Musical Engagement, Jacob Gown led our preschoolers in a Channukah celebration. Among traditional songs, he sang “True Colors”, most notably performed by Cyndi Lauper. Jacob explained that during Channukah, we should use the light of the Channukiah to remind us to see our light, allowing our true colors to shine brightly through the world. How often have we heard the phrase, “Be yourself.” But do we mean it? Be yourself…but don’t wear that. Be yourself…but don’t cause a raucous. Be yourself…but only to the extent that it is good for the crowd. Be…

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The Good Place


I am a latecomer to the watching of the Netflix show, “The Good Place.” Please don’t spoil the end of Season 1 or Season 2. I am really only at the beginning. With that being said, the show questions and interprets the existence of the afterlife. What does it look like in the world to come? How do you get there? Do your actions in life matter in relationship to what’s next? Without getting into Jewish accounts of the afterlife, I am most interested in the idea of being a just “ok” person. The main character, Eleanor, is troubled that…

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The Great Greeting Debate


It is a tradition for my family to go out for breakfast the day after Thanksgiving. We stumbled out of bed, brushed the hair out of out eyes and laughed as every other person in the restaurant appeared the same: a tired-after-turkey- consumption kind of look. We ate, giggled, shared jokes and stories about the night before, and felt grateful for each other’s company. As we left the restaurant, the owner told one of his employees to change their goodbye greeting from “Happy Thanksgiving” to “Happy Holidays.” And immediately, the employee looked at us, opened the door and said, “Happy…

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A Message for Thanksgiving


I need Thanksgiving more than ever. I love turkey and stuffing and pumpkin pie. But moreover, I love that for a week, we are meant to focus on gratitude, blessings and how we can gift ourselves to others. This is the first time that I am taking my child to volunteer with others that are impoverished and in need of a smile or two. It is my attempt to impart the message that our purpose as human beings is to open our hearts, extend our hands, and ask, “How can I brighten this world?” Paraphrasing the Baal HaTurim, Rabbi Lori…

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Who are you fooling anyway?


In Toldot, Jacob deceives his father Isaac by pretending to be his brother and attains the birthright blessing. Jacob covers his arms with fur, tricking Isaac due to Isaac’s old age, poor health, and weak eyes. Isaac says, “The voice is the voice of Jacob, but the hands are the hands of Esau.” Commentators posit that if Jacob was able to disguise his arms, couldn’t he disguise his voice? Whether it was lowering or raising his voice, whispering or pretending he was hoarse from the hunt, certainly Jacob could take a few more steps to completely convince his father. But…

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You Don’t Look Jewish


Growing up in Orange County, it was a refrain I would hear often. “You don’t look Jewish.” Light hair, fair-skinned, blue eyes, I struggled with the people that would try to convince me with might and frustration that I couldn’t possibly be born a Jew. My mother would remind me to look the agitator in the eye and respond, “Well, tell me. What then, does a Jew look like?” Just take a look at our congregation on a Shabbat morning. Dark, light, blue-eyed or green, Persian, Israeli, Russian, native Californian…we all look Jewish to me. But not because of our…

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An Extra Soul


On Erev Shabbat, the Talmud teaches us that we receive an extra soul. I never thought to ask, “Where does this soul come from?” Rashi explains that with an extra soul comes an expanded heart. That perhaps, within ourselves is always the possibility of this hidden soul. With reflection, prayer and introspection, Shabbat is the time in which our heart breaks open and the extra soul is revealed. But there is another way to think about this Shabbas gift. Perhaps, just perhaps, the extra soul is a visit from a loved one that has traveled from beyond this world. On…

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