Rabbi Guzik - A Bisl Torah

It’s the season of love. Or at least, according to Hallmark.

I sat down with a cherished mentor and we discussed reasons one enters and remains in a profession. People often enter and leave jobs because of other personalities. An inspiring boss, creative colleague, fantastic team. The opposite is also encountered. Demeaning experiences, frustrating interactions, and emotionally draining relationships.

Recently, Elmo, the character from Sesame Street, took to Twitter and asked the world, “How are you?” The response was tremendous. People were honest. Some explained that today is harder than yesterday. Others shared that they’re treading water, afraid of what might come next.

It is the season for Tu Bishvat, the birthday of the trees. It seems odd to have a celebration of nature during one of the coldest months of the years. However, Rashi explains this is precisely when we should be celebrating nature.

In attending a family brit milah, we visited a synagogue that merged with my home shul. In tribute to my home shul, the new chapel is adorned with the former shul’s ark doors and yahrzeit plaques. Many of my family members are memorialized on these walls.

Efficiency is overrated. Jim Benson, an expert in time management, claims that efficiency becomes “a limitless reservoir for other people’s expectations.” Author Oliver Burkeman explains that we should stop worrying about our overflowing to do lists, endless emails, and attempts to finish everything. Burkeman doesn’t imply that we ignore our responsibilities. However, he suggests we refrain from “clearing the decks.” Clearing the decks is the idea that through our busy work, we will eventually see blank slates and empty counters. The attempt is futile. Getting to a zero inbox leads to more emails and more responses. Checking off bucket lists means we will inevitably fill the list with other random duties. We are engaged in an endless race in completing meaningless tasks instead of choosing to engage in meaningful moments.

Recently, my husband and I celebrated our 14th wedding anniversary. A few days prior, we went on a family walk. I suggested we walk to Walgreens. My husband immediately agreed. We looked at each other and both sheepishly smiled. I confessed, “You need to buy your anniversary card, too?” He replied, “Absolutely.” As we walked together and laughed at the idea that we were buying each other’s cards at the same time, we both admitted that the card was redundant to the experience. Written expressions of love are good reminders, but carving out time to walk with those we love is priceless.

The heaviness of the year feels palpable.

Franklin Pierce was our 14th US president. Prior to the presidency, President Pierce suffered the death of his young sons. One was 11-years-old and died in a train crash.

It is easy to extinguish one’s flame. Think of how many times we experienced an uplifting day only to be quashed by one person’s negative words or insults. In receiving a job evaluation, we tend to focus only on suggested improvements instead of words of praise. Our tendency is to allow our light to go out. Be it from comments or mood, we allow someone else to determine how bright our light will shine. And yet, our tradition encourages the nourishment of one’s own inner spirit. We control whether someone else dims our spark. Instead, we can choose to ignite the flames within.