Posts by Rabbi David Wolpe

When I was in college people would tell me that it was not ‘real life.’ Everyone had a definition of ‘real life’ – it began when one was married, or had a job, or had children. We promote this idea of provisional living – during the pandemic we say we aren’t living ‘real life.’ Someone told me we should now wish one another “until 121” instead of the biblical 120 years, since 2020 does not count. But it is not so. Every day and every week and every year is equally ‘real.’ Kindergarten is as real as graduate school which is as…

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There is a Talmudic teaching that one should do something and the reason will follow – mitoch shelo l’shma, bah l’shma. Part of this counsel is the understanding that often emotion follows action, rather than preceding it. Act joyously and you will feel joy. It is easy to get caught in theory and propose ways to live without living. The ancient Greek philosopher Epictetus critiques those too enmeshed in theory this way in his Discourses: “A carpenter does not approach you and say ‘Listen to me talk about the art of carpentry. He makes a contract for a house and…

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When a family returns from a funeral in the Jewish tradition, there is a meal, seudat havra’ah, the meal of consolation. It is the first step in returning to life after loss. At the end of shiva, the seven days of mourning, the mourners rise and walk around the block. After grieving at home for a week, one must rejoin the outside world. Shiva is not to extend past seven days; as there is mandated mourning, there is a mandated end to mourning. The Jewish emphasis on the sanctity and beauty of life is not only seen in difficult times….

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The renowned English psychoanalyst, Donald Winnicott, famously proposed the idea of the “good enough mother.” Winnicott taught that parents should understand that they cannot provide everything the child demands. Yes, the child will grow frustrated, but the developing child’s frustration is essential to autonomy and to growth. Parents need not be – indeed never could be – perfect. It is good enough to be good enough. As a Rabbi I have often seen the reverse. Children whose parents are at the end of life blame themselves for not being there for aging parents at every minute. Many who have spent…

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There are various legends of the Golem, the creature of clay who is brought to life by a wonder working rabbi. The most famous involves that of Rabbi Judah Loew, the famed Maharal of Prague. In these legends, it is God’s name that animates the creature. In the case of the Maharal, the Golem is finally destroyed because God’s name is pulled from his mouth. In the legend of Rabbi Elijah of Chelm, the name of God was on its forehead, and once removed, it “turned to nothing and returned to earth.” The Golem was the fantastically powerful hero of…

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It is not easy to demonstrate miracles, but here are three things about the modern state of Israel that make one wonder: 1. The people who created the state came almost entirely from dictatorships and autocracies and yet created a democratic system of government. 2. The official language, Hebrew, is a language that had not been spoken as an everyday tongue for some 2,000 years. Yet it has produced novelists and poets of world class standing, including two Nobel prize winners in literature. 3. The Jewish people had been without self-governance and without an army for 2,000 years. They were…

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“Why are you doing that?” “What’s that for?” Modern society makes us captives of teleology. That is, we think we should be acting for a reason and aiming toward a goal. We are supposed to be living purpose driven lives and everything in it should be animated by some end, great or small. But some of the best moments of life have no purpose but themselves. When children are playing, they are playing to play. When we become adults and take time to play, a vague guilt trails after us as though we should not be spending our time on…

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Two words spoken in the Torah sum up an entire world view. Negating those words, contradicting them, proving them untrue, is a noble and necessary mission. The words are “Lo Nukhal.” In Genesis Jacob comes across a group of shepherds gathered around the well (Gen,29:2). The well is covered by a giant stone. When Jacob asks them why they do not remove the stone and water their sheep, they answer “Lo Nukhal” — we cannot. Jacob walked over and rolled the stone off the mouth of the well. Perhaps you can’t, his actions declared, but I can. Everyone lives with limitations. There…

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We do not know why Abraham is chosen. Later however, God describes the special nature of Abraham’s mission: “I have singled him out that he may instruct his children and posterity” (Gen. 18:19). In other words, God saw in Abraham the capacity to educate others. Abraham is the original influencer – a teacher. What does Abraham’s conduct teach us? He does not leave home alone. For the journey to Canaan along with his wife Sarah, Abraham brings his nephew Lot. They each prosper in the new land and quarrels break out between their herdsmen. Abraham has been the force behind…

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Judaism begins in walking. God tells Abraham to ‘lech,’ go, and he and Sarah walk for many miles to the land that will be Israel. Jewish law is called halachah, which means walking. Angels are sometimes referred to as omdim, those who stand, as opposed to human beings, who walk. Motion is life and change and growth. Movement of the body aids movement of the mind. An angel tells the depressed and motionless Elijah to walk back to the people, Miriam dances in joy at the sea, and Isaac, when he first sees his beloved Rebeka, is wandering in the…

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